Thursday, January 19, 2006

I shot the sheriff, but I wish I'd hit the deputy...

Sorry dear ladies and two boys who read my blog, life has been boring of late. I don't have much to say.

Sidenote: Why don't more boys read my blog? Boys like funny girls, don't they? Don't they? Answer me, damn you!

Ahem. Forgive the outburst. I am cranky today. The reason involves food. Of course. My mom brought over cupcakes with special frosting last night. When I went to bed later, there were 4 cupcakes left. By the time my grandpa and I got up this morning, my grandma had eaten them all. FOUR cupcakes! With special frosting! Wouldn't you be annoyed? Waking up and knowing that you have to go paint the library, already having a massive headache (which may or may not have to do with dreaming about being bitten by a vampire and then stocking peanut butter ice cream at a convenience store), and the only highlight of the morning would be a lovely chocolate cupcake? Grr...

Anyway, like I said, I had to paint the walls at the library across from my house. There was a "professional" in earlier this fall to do the main walls, and I volunteered to finish off above the bookshelves. I used the term professional loosely because the guy was my former history teacher, Mr. Fitz. And when he finished painting, he made me clean up after him. Including picking up a mini fridge off the floor and putting it back up on a counter. Lazy bastard.

So I painted for a couple of hours this morning. And even though I had volunteered to do it, I'm gonna get paid. Yay! I will also get paid for attending a library workshop on a new computer program, and then for teaching it to the rest of the staff in CH.

Back to last night, Mom, Manda and Jersey came over for the second night of "American Idol." Tuesday night Kristen called during a commercial break to imitate one of the auditions. A sheriff's deputy from W. VA was auditioning in Chicago. He only sang the line "I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy," over and over and over again. It was hilarious. So Kristen called, and after I said hello, she sang that line. Then last night there was a cowboy teenager who auditioned. He was very nervous and not really a good singer (although he made it thru to Hollywood). But after a nervous beginning, he stopped and said, "I've only ever sang in front of a turkey before." At the commercial break, I called up Kristen. When she answered, I handed the phone to Manda, who promptly squeaked out, "I only ever sang in front of a turkey before." We all laughed, and I got back on the line.

KRISTEN: I was gonna call you and say, "Brokeback Mountain?"
ME: "I wish I could quit you."
We laugh hysterically. Then AI comes back on.
ME: Ooh, it's back on. Gotta go.
KRISTEN: Okay. Wish-I-could-quit-you-bye! *click*

Now I would like to take a moment to say a special thank you to the wonderful Metamorphose. Because without her and the spectacular November CD, I never would have heard of Andrew Bird or loved the song "Fake Palindromes." And without her, Kristen never would have looked him up and discovered that he'll be performing in the Twin Cities in February. So, thank you, Metamorphose. Kristen and I will be attending the Andrew Bird concert, and I will finally get to have gone to a real concert.*

*And by concert, I do not mean country music, Firehouse, or The Gin Blossoms. They don't count. Although I would totally *do* Wade Hayes.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my god, you got to have Fitzie near you? He is so freaking hot. I'm totally jealous.

April said...

WHAT??? Are you nuts? Mr. Pitts turns you on?

Oh, God, Nic. I was just recruited for the Alert's "Meet Your Neighbor" column. Why can't I be 10 million pounds lighter??

atsirk said...

Totally understand about the cupcakes. How rude! Mmmmm, cupcakes. Must find some!

TOWR said...

LOL My best friend and I have been blubbering over each other crying, "Ah wish ah could queet yoouuu!" **Contented sigh** Thank you, Brokeback Mountain.

And sorry about the cupcakes. That blows.

redlaw said...

April, I would kill to be one tenth as witty as you and Kriten are, kill, I tell you!
I'd probably be able to watch American Idol if I were that witty...
*sigh*

i i eee said...

Ack! I'm soo jealous you two are going to see Andrew Bird in concert!! Awesome! I hope he's good live, I really don't know, but his album is wonderful. Make sure you fill us in on all the details -especially since this will be a *real* concert.

I have yet to see Brokeback Mountain. But I have read the story it's based from.

April said...

I haven't actually gotten to see "Brokeback Mountain" yet, but I really want to. It will probably never play in our theater, though. They reserves spots only for worthless, mind-numbing crap, like "Sin City."

Redlaw, What? You're totally witty. And it doesn't take wits to watch American Idol...just self-esteem low enough to form a desperate need to make fun of others.

Meta, I'll definitely blog about the concert. I'm really excited. But on his website, he said that he rearranges and rewrites his songs every night, so who knows what the concert will be like?

Anonymous said...

Ooh, how important are you that you get to be featured in the paper?! That's so cool. And if you were 10 million pounds lighter you would be negative by like, a lot of pounds, so don't wish for that.

You didn't ever know about my Fitzie crush? I used to dream of having his children. I used to put 69696969 on his calculator when he wasn't looking. Very mature, I know. Try to hold back your awe.

April said...

Fitz is so abrasive, though. He makes me want to kick him in the shin, then run.

Kristen said...

I'm so mad about the cupcake right now, you don't even know. I made this special oat bran apple bread over the weekend and my dad at almost all of it. I was pissed, since it was suppose to be for my breakfast for the next few weeks.
I'm very protective of my food.

Kristen said...

um...he ate it...not at it.

April said...

I'm pretty sure he at it, too. :)